Love Hurts - The Piecey 3

So today I was battling with trying to find something funny, wise or quippy to say.  Quippy isn’t a word, but you know what I mean.  So, my thoughts are a little piecey today.  (Piecey isn’t a word either.  Deal with it).  I will simply reflect on 3 piecy things floating in my brain – and somehow, I believe they all relate – to love.

#1 – Today I experienced the fact that love hurts!  I hear some song from the 80’s in my head as I say that.  I mean, it’s easy to love people you like, it’s the ones that hurt or tick us off that cause pain in the love process! If I truly love someone it means I have to forgive them.  There are big things to forgive, and there are little things.  I’m the queen of little things - like little offenses!  I am so easily offended it’s ridiculous!  I absolutely hate that about myself, and am working hard to change it.  This week I made a list of people I thought I needed to forgive.  It was a very long list – like, really long.  But, I had to do it.  How can I really love people if I don’t forgive them?  I can’t.  It’s fake living. 

I went through each person and each “thing” that I felt they did to deserve my anger, irritation, or judgment.  I allowed myself to say out loud the things that they did to hurt me or piss me off, and how it made me feel.  I acknowledged the hurt; mostly stuff they probably weren’t even aware of.  None-the-less, until I “let them off the hook” and forgave them, I couldn’t love them.  So today, someone on my list called me….and in usual fashion…pissed me off by one of their usual careless comments.  I didn’t react to them with words…just silence.  “I’m not going to laugh when you insult me.”  I thought.  “I’ll just let your dumb words hang in the air and let you feel the stupidity of them.”  I know…the love was just pouring out of me.  I knew I had to forgive AGAIN, knowing that this WILL BE a lifelong process with this person!  How fun is THAT!? Lucky me, I came across an article on gratitude (Walt Larimore) about an hour after this incident occurred, and learned that as soon as I feel hurt, insulted, or angry I can think this: “Now for something good…” and find something to be grateful for about the person or situation.  So, I did.  It wasn’t even that hard.  And I will continue to “think of something good” when the crappy crap feeling toward them comes up.  She can’t help that she’s a human being any more than I can. 

#2 – Our new dog follows me around all day – all happy-like!  She just WAITS for me to pet her or talk to her or give her eye contact, or a treat!  Where I go, she goes.  And when she can’t get close to me, she finds the next closest place. It is constant love and attention on ME.  Her tail wags and wags, and her eyes are always expectant, hopeful, and trusting!  I’m seeing how rude and mean I am to her.  I complain that she’s in my way.  I irritatingly tell her that no, I’m not playing now, and to go lay down.  I withhold petting her because I feel likes she’s just going to want more – more - more!  I so take advantage of her complete love for me.  I don’t like the way this makes me feel inside.  (Of course, if you were here, I wouldn’t treat her this way because I’d want you to think I was better than I am.  But, you’re not fooled, are you?)  I figure if I can just stop the rude tone of my voice and instead respond each time in a loving tone, it would train me to stop my rudeness to my family, and then trickle down to the rest of the world from there.  Maybe - maybe not.  It’s going to be hard, though.

#3 – So over Thanksgiving I was reading this article by one of the leading cancer researchers in America.  I can’t remember his name, but he was extremely committed to a cure for cancer and wanted to find one desperately in his lifetime!  (He’s in his 70’s I think).  The thought occurred to me, “What if HE got cancer?”  How ironic would that be?  And it seemed to me he would be they type of guy who would say, “Good.  I got it – now I can experience what I’ve been researching and can better help those who have suffered from this horrible disease!”  And, I thought, too, that he might pray a prayer like: “Just let me recover, God, so I can go on helping everyone else.”  He just had that type of commitment and passion for his work and mission.  And then it struck me, when Jesus Christ came to earth as a baby, he came FROM HEAVEN….healthy, perfect heaven…TO EARTH…disease ridden, imperfect earth.  Why as a baby?  It seems to me he could then experience everything that a dying human being would experience.  As soon as we are born we start to die, really.  It’s like Jesus willingly got cancer-- so that he could experience the pain of it--- so he could better understand, empathize, and help those he came to save.  He could speak into our pain because he experienced it himself. 

I’ve found that to be true in my relationship with Jesus Christ.  I’ve got to figure that He struggled to love certain people, too.  And forgive?  He did more of that than I ever will. If love equals forgiveness, I guess I’d rather forgive and hurt than not forgive and hurt anyways. We bear the consequences of other’s offenses toward us either way.